World War Z... LIVE!

I am currently watching World War Z. I thought this might be a good time to stop and tell you how I'm feeling about this. In real time. It's only fair really, as nerds, dorks, and geeks who have already seen this, you must be rolling your eyes. "How could she not have seen World War Z? It's only been everywhere!"  I know. And I'm remedying that now. So you get to hear my thoughts as I watch the movie.

***WARNING Here there be spoilers***

Seriously, I'm going to be talking about the plot and specific incidents so if you haven't seen it yet, welcome to the interwebs and get yourself a Netflix account.

I am about 25 minutes into the movie right now. This is right after Brad Pitt tells the spanish-speaking family that movement is life. Movimiento es Vida. But they stay, and moments after Brad and his family leave we hear the screaming of runner zombies. We can assume what happens to that lovely family. (Psst: It's Zombies) Cut to the whole family running up the Apartment stairs to get to the magic helicopter on the roof they keep telling their kids about much in the same way the suits Brad is talking to is telling him.

Okay - Dude. why is Brad Pitt the ONLY one with a fracking weapon? and whatever duct taped to your arm that passes for armour? Shouldn't the last person on your little rope chain also have some duct tape armour? Unless you want to literally be tied to a zombie version of your wife/child. I couldn't really tell who is last in line. But regardles, no one wants that. NO ONE.

Speaking of Brad Pitt being the only one with armour... How about a weapon for your wife?! Why is he sole defender of a family of four? Bitch- there are eight hands that can hold weapons in this chain gang. Are six of them broken? Honestly, if your wife can't handle a weapon when literally being attacked by ZOMBIES and facing not only her zombification (?) but that of her children and she STILL can't handle picking up a knife or duct-tape-handled shard of glass?

Brad, you may need to sit for this.

Leave her. That's it.
You can not survive fighting by yourself against the entire state of New Jersey filled with Zombies. Cut the weakest link. Who, you ask? I dunno, let's saaaaay.... the ONLY OTHER ADULT but she can't handle a Gorram weapon!! OH! You know who else looks a whole lot like the weakest link right about now? Connie.

Yeah, I know, your sweet baby. Cut. Her. Loose. All she does is bitch about her blankie, be overprotected, carried, pushed in a shopping cart, told to follow, told to listen, whine, and cry. I'm sorry, I know it's your kid and all but when the fast-running-scary turn-you-immediately-into-one-of-them zombies come a knockin'........ You may need to pick a favorite.

Oh god. That means the favorite is the asthmatic, Oh dude. You're screwed. Accept your fate. but maybe make a good show so your family dies thinking you tried.

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one minute later...

Okay, the zombie getting tossed down the elevator shaft is cool, very well done. And HOLY SHIT. Little kid is AWESOME. That kid was a caretaker from the start. But his save is one thing I didn't see. Also the Frau finally gets some non-feminine responsibilities and handles some shit buy walking through a door and lighting a flare. Woo. Feminists everywhere applaud. (that's sarcasm.) 

Which may be another story for another time; but at the very beginning of this movie they talked about Brad giving up his job to be a stay at home dad. Great! Awesome! More power to you as a father and a dad and your wife as the primary earner in the family. SHE brings home the bacon. This might be a good movie.... Anf then zombies strike and she's completely helpless.

Alright, so they get rescued... now what? Whatever government agency/contractor Brad used to work for has some pull, but why are they saving him? Is he that much Hot Shit? Who is he? Gaius Baltar? Mr. I'm too important to be left to die on this forsaken planet? Or more like a Shepherd Book... "Check my ident card"- and tell the Alliance what to do as all of his friends stand idly by, shocked and confused? Well?! Which?

And please tell me he kept on to that Albuterol because I guarantee that kid's going to need her inhaler again.

And suddenly- ohmygods they're landing on a Carrier in the Atlantic. Ok, so ... government not contractor. That was fast. Good job wifey, you saved us! Not His willingness to throw himself off of a building if he even speculated that he was infected, so as to save your pitiful lives with his last moments.

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33 minutes in...
"Take a look around here Mr. Lane, Each and every one of these people are here because they serve a purpose. There's no room for non-essential personnel. 
Another reason to ditch the family. *cough* I mean, oh wow! look how great of a thing he's whatever at the time of the... now.

YAWN.

Anywho. As I see them, the interesting points of this conversation are thus:
1. They are on an aircraft carrier. At sea. and unless the zombies learn to swim, I think they will be fine until food runs out.
1. a) You are pretty darn well armed. I think you'll be okay.
1. b) Stop bringing new people on board with their entire families and you will have a longer food supply. We saw one guy with a wife and two kids, but the next guy has 3 grandkids that he can't leave behind, and the next woman is taking care of her elderly parents and can't leave them behind... or her 2 kids. And the dog has to come now too.

THIS IS A MILITARY OPERATION. Leave your family at home, and do your job. If you save the human race, GREAT! Awesome! Wunderbar! Thanks a lot buddy! If not, well, you're probably dead so you don't care anymore.

and 2. This guy either has a SERIOUS Gilbert and Sullivan complex (-it's the one about duty! -they're allI about duty.) or he owes the government some serious facetime. Like, they gave that guy launch codes or something . Was he head of Homeland Security or something? WHO could be so important? *cough* Shepherd Book *cough* 

I see where this is going, Book. You thought you had me!

Hitting play on the movie now.

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one minute later...

Seriously?! Ok. I legitimately hate his wife. F: "You absolutely CAN NOT go!" M: "They need me to! and if I don't they'll give us to the zombies!" F: "But please, no! I'm helpless without you" M: "Don't worry, I'll stop the Zombies, fix the world, come back, get you, and then go home." F: "......         Okay. But I'm not happy about it."

Whine about your survival some more, please. You're welcome. And take care of this kid who saved all of our lives while you were opening a door and lighting a flare and couldn't stop me from eating zombie blood because doing all three was too complicated.

and the Airplane hatch opening at minute 39 was one of the scariest things ever.

OH GODS ZOMBIES!!!!

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about 40 minutes in... 
South Korea.
Shit just got real.
We find out that not only are the zombies everywhere, but body shots only slow them down, head shots are best and just to be safe they burn the bodies. Then we see the room of mostly ashes. and some unburned fingers... and they're moving! So the only way to really kill these dead people is to literally burn them away. We already heard the super smart doctor guy saying that mother nature is the best serial killer, but there's always a chink in the armour. That she tries to disguise her greatest weaknesses as strengths. Also to verify they are alive, they check the eyes with a red light. I wonder if she was checking for pupil contraction or blood vessels or what?

What else do we know? Oh! they are attracted to sound. That's going to be a big one.
Also that the memo/ e-mail was sent from South Korea 11 days ago. So in less than 2 weeks, it's spread from there to America.

Seriously, the fast zombies actually scare me. I'm watching this with the lights on.

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46 minutes in...
I had to stop it when David Morse (!) started pulling his teeth out. In all fairness.... No teeth no biting no spread of disease, even though he claims it can't be a virus. I suppose we shall see.

OH GOD IT MADE A SOUND!!! UGH!!! I can't handle that kind of stuff!

OMG! David Morse just said No teeth no biting no great spread or something almost identical. That's awesome. I love when I get shit right. I mean, ick, but cool.

And now we head to Jerusalem. If they are drawn to sound, how do they expect to take off and land an airplane? Just saying...

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55 minutes in...
Jerusalem.
Nothing very important has happened here yet.

1:01
OK! Things are happening now in Jerusalem!!!
Everyone be quiet!!! Eek!!

Alright, a minute later we see a confused looking elderly man surrounded by zombies and they are ignoring him. This is not the first time we see someone completely quiet being ignored by the Z's. I feel like we are getting a fuller picture now of what the zombies entail...

This is incredibly entertaining, Jerusalem buildings are very close together so when the zombies come in it's like watching Zombie Parkour through the Holy Land.

That.... is not a sentence I ever would have imagined I would need in my life.

More J-town: I just watched the bit where the bald kid with a cricket bat covers his head and curls up into a bal and the zombies ignore him because he's silent. But it's more than that. They're not ignoring him, they're specifically avoiding him. And thinking about it, that's what happened last time too, the Z's specifically, intentionally avoided the old man in the crowd. I bet that will be of importance later. Unless it was just used to exaggerate the fact that they can't see you if you're quiet.

Woah. What if they can't see? That's my 1 hour 5 prediction. 1:05 and I'm calling that the zombies are blind. but they can't be using like, radar or echo because first of all they wouldn't be equipped with that sensory knowledge. And second, those techniques would have the Z's doing a whole heck of a lot of quiet-sitting-still-people eating. That makes sense with te red lights in the eyes now. Looking for occlusions.

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1:15 hours in...
Almost to Cardiff
I think Jewish Army Girl is turning into a zombie still. The little chihuahua dog keep barking at her. He's been doing it since they got on the plane and at first it was like, oh, that's an annoying dog, but now it's a very deliberate "I am staring at you and barking (yipping) now."

Alright. So the dog was barking at a zombie, just not the woman I thought had a delayed reaction. Neato. So now BRad Pitt just has to tell the first class cabin to shut the hell up, right? Your Silence will save you!

The Silence Will Fall! ---wait, no. that's different.

Which now begs the question, if the person has prior knowledge before becoming infected, do they retain that knowledge? Will the stewardess remember there are people up front? Will the other passengers? Will she remember who the Soldier is? Brad Pitt? The Pilots? I don't know. I guess not though. otherwise this would be a pretty short movie.

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1:17 hours in...
Still almost in Cardiff
This annoys me. (surprise?) Why are they fortifying the curtains??? First of all, they're curtains. second, if you are silent, it shouldn't matter. The (what did that guy call them?) Zekes can't hear/see/notice you.
So yes. YES. Let's take this probably unnecessary precaution that requires several people to move around the cabin at once and you know, you just know, that someone is going to drop a bag and then what? It's like shouting out, "Hey! Let's give away the location to our secret headquarters!!!!" But inherently worse because, fast moving zombies.

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1:18 hours in...

15 seconds later..... Yup. just what I said. Great. I mean, it makes for a great film sequence, the Proletariat in hand to hand combat against the bourgeoisie, but I still think this whole fight is Brad's fault. Completely unnecessary.


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1:27 hours in...
AHHHH PETER CAPALDI!!!!! 
Oh my god, It's seriously Peter Capaldi. He's awesome and so super cool and really good looking actually, I mean, for being a bit older but What's he doing in this movie oh my god it's really him?!

Sorry. Let me get ahold of myself.

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1:27 hours in... 2nd try
CardiffThe guy is impaled. ok. good. Otherwise that entire crash sequence would have been utterly stupid. no one gets out of that crash without a scratch. At first we are led to believe that Brad is the only survivor, then we see a Zeke, and then Soldier Girl. Alright. Fine. Fair enough, everyone else who wasn't strapped to a seat got sucked out of the gaping hole in the side of the aircraft. Or disappeared, or whatever. MOVIES! 

So the first thing, I mean the VERY first thing Brad does is try to remove what's impaled him?! WHAT AN IDIOT.
Seriously, how many arteries, veins, organs has that thing punctured and now happens to be holding together by it's mere presence?! Let's take it out! Oh. Wait. No, that's the absolute worst thing you could do at that moment. Really. Hello internal bleeding!

So they magically make it to the WHO and all of a sudden, Peter freaking Capaldi is there. I think he said something, I freaked out and hit pause to give myself a fangirl moment.

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?? hours in...

A New Level of Geekdom

As of next thursday, I will have reached a new level of geekdom. Cosplay. (Amanda, cosplay is when you dress as characters from TV, movies, comic books or other fandoms) 

I'll let that sink in a moment. But Jane! You were so cool! Why?

Thanks, internet, and yes. I was cool. I still am! Even more so now! Promise. 

It all started when I met Captain Kyle. Just a random guy on the street in Center City, dressed as Captain Hammer like it was nothing. I got a picture with him and friended him on Facebook. Than we became friends. And that's kind of how it all started.

Four sweater vests!!

For a while now, people have been telling me that I should go to Cons, (Conventions) but I always thought people who did that were TOTALLY out there. Out there in a way I couldn't see myself getting excited over or wanting to be a part of. Now I realize how crazy I was to exclude something potentially very fun from my life for no reason other than the 3 year old's reaction: Ew! I don't wanna. 

A lot earlier this year, maybe even very late last year, my cousin's husband Julian talked me into going to Philadelphia's Wizard World Con this summer, actually in less than a week (EEK!!!) And becoming friends with Kyle inspired (and very strongly encouraged!) my going as a character. Because I am such a total Whovian, I wanted to go as Amy Pond every day of the four-day convention. Then I remembered there are other things I enjoy too. I decided a few weeks ago that I am going as Jayne Cobb from Firefly, and Captain Kyle is going as Mal Reynolds on Sunday of Wizard World and another friend is going as Kaylee. S we're going to be a whole little set. It's wonderful.

Where to begin?

I had NO idea where to begin. 

My step-niece turned 13 a week or so after I decided I wanted to try cosplaying and it was a Doctor Who themed party. Perfect. I can test drive this whole cos thing. But where to start? I couldn't realistically start dropping mad cash on costumes and accessories but without those, what else is there? 

Luckily, on Purim I had strongly encouraged my boyfriend to go as Matt Smith so I had access to a perfect 11th Doctor costume. He had the fez, bow tie and suspenders. I had a colored buttoned shirt and tweed jacket. I think it worked out well. I just have to get rid of the glasses, but they kind of match and I can't see anything without them. : /

What I like to call the $1300 selfie.

Seriously, The Doctor loves Birthdays!

What's Next?
Besides that West Wing reference? (Amanda got it.) I am going to try to finish this Ood mask that I am crocheting for day one of Wizard World, if I can't get it done in time I can fall back on my 11th Doctor. (Obviously. I rocked that.) I will be posting more in a day or so about how the other costumes are coming along and how panicked I am about wearing them out. I think everything will be fine. I just need to have some confidence in myself.

This is the Ood mask.

In case you just squealed at the sight and idea of making your own Ood mask, I am including the link to the free pattern by Lilana Wofsey Dohnert.

Ood Ski Mask Crochet Pattern by Lilana Wofsey Dohnert

If you, on the other hand, just decided that maybe I'm a loooooot weirder than you thought and that ood thing is just odd and what is falling from its face?! You should watch Doctor Who. You're welcome in advance.

Everyone has issues

A friend recently linked to this article on the Book of Face: 23 Full-Sized Struggles Every Short Woman Wants You To Know About on HuffPo by Renee Jacques. Well, here is my retort.

As a skinny, average heighted (5'7") woman with long legs (and no torso) there are many height and weight related issues we Tall/Skinny people face daily. If short girls get a huffpo write up, well then, dammit! I can have a blog post. *These are all directly referencing the linked HuffPo 23 things.*

1. Just as irritating as bathroom mirrors being hung too high are full length mirrors that are too low! No, I didn't want to see my face. I need to be doing more squats at the gym if I plan on wearing makeup in the next week.

2. "How tall are you" gets a lot weirder when the answer is: "Your exact height. We've done this before."

3. Shocked looks when they hear the answer? I get confused looks, like, they don't believe I'm as tall as they are. (Also that's really a sub-section to 2.)

4. Top shelves in your kitchen are untouched? I have no idea what is under any counter or in any bottom 3 drawers anywhere. And I still can't reach the top shelves or the cabinet over the fridge without a chair.

5. People ask your shoe size. Yup. That's just the life of people being weird and having no personal boundaries.

6. Getting carded: My mom still gets carded at bars, I know too many bartenders for that. That's just a nice compliment. also, looking young ≠ being short
7. this complaint is the same as the one above it.

8. People dismiss your insecurities. Tiny isn't just for short people! That one all skinny people deal with. I get dirty looks if I even mention working out. It's like, ok world, I'll just atrophy and melt into a blob to make you feel better about being a big old fatty-fat.

9. Pants. Why, oh WHY don't women's pants come in measured sizes like mens?!!! ???? !!!
Seriously! At least short people can hem or cuff long pants. Options for me are: a. floods. "Why are your pants so high up?" Because, ass, I'm tall. Thanks for pointing out the problem I've had since I was 12. Or b. belts. Lots and lots of belts. So many belts!
So yes, you may have to cuff your jeans, I need to buy a size up on everything so I look ridiculous, oh, and they are all $12-17$ more when you include the cost of the belt.

10. Skinny people problems: Yes, I do shop in juniors as a 28 year old. Thanks for asking. Why, no, none of the styles are appealing. No. hardly anything fits in the right spots, and also no, I don't enjoy buying everything 2-4 sizes larger to allow for kids being so damn tiny.
It might save money but now I run into 13 year olds in the same outfit.

11. Clothing stores don't carry items in petit? Well, they don't carry shit in long either. I have to buy a size up on everything long-sleeved or there's a 3 inch gap between my wrist and cuff.

11a! If I want that super cute jacket in my size, I need to get one with super short sleeves and a flattering body; or one that could fit another me in the body but hey look! the sleeves fit!

12. People decide to pick you up without permission. Yup. I get fireman carried all the time. By many different people. Just 'cause. Whether I want to or not. And I usually don't prefer to have some guy's shoulder digging into my abdomen if I can help it.

13. People pat you on the head.
Awwwww. It's almost as if women aren't constantly being condescended in life and on-line to the point where it is now a social norm. Womp womp.

Sidenote with being a nerd and female at the same time: Dear men, when I tell you I'm obsessed with Doctor Who, an appropriate question is, "Who is your favorite Doctor/Companion?" a douchey question is, "Have you seen any episodes before David Tennant? How about before the 9th Doctor? Do you know their full names going back to the first? Who is your favorite companion excluding all of the ones since Eccleston?"
Also inappropriate is asking if I watch every nerdy show you can think of until you find one I don't just to dismiss me and/or "have you seen the original version of ___?" No, asshat. Seeing as how my MOTHER was 13 when the original BSG was on the air, let's go ahead and assume I haven't.

But I digress.

14. Concerts. All concerts are like that for everyone unless you're that 6'4'' 250lbs. bearded guy standing in the third row for what I assume is legally required to be able to call it a "concert"

16. Someone's head is always blocking you at the movies. I literally look like I'm 5'0" when I sit down (yay disproportionally long legs!) so I'm totally feelin' ya on that.

15. Can't reach the gas pedal. Well, for my arms to comfortably reach the wheel, my feel are 3 inches behind the pedals. Being tall isn't all it's cracked up to be.

17. Are you a midget? Ok. you win here short people. No one asks me if I'm a midget. But I do get the trying-not-to-be-horrified "Ohmahgad! How short is your torso?!" when I sit down, so... evens on this one?

18. Using your head as an armrest. Again, I don't get that but I do get, "Excuse me, would you mind getting that thing down for me from that higher thing?" everywhere. Clothing stores, grocery store, the kitchen, younameit. I love it especially when it's a place I clearly do not work at. And when it's something clearly 3+ feet over my head. No. I can't help you. Find an employee and leave me alone.

19. People walk into you on the street. This may happen to short people more, but as a female of the skinny persuasion, people will walk in large groups and instead of moving to one side, walking single file, or god-forbid clearing a path for oncoming pedestrian traffic, they will assume I am invisible? or will push my back against that nearby house to allow them to pass. That's when the elbows come out. Bitch don't play.

20. Subway rush hour means being wedged under some guy's armpit. Find a spot with an upright and hold on. There are many way around this. In what city was this written? Girl needs to figure out her life because there is no way I'd deal with that.

21. When tall people's arms go up (to grasp a subway pole, high-five a friend, put on a jacket...) they inevitably come down on your head. Nope, can't say this one happens to me. But I am right at that awkward height that everybody's hands are right about my ass level when they stand normally. So if you've got a long swing to your arms as you walk, you're probably going to hit my ass on the way. Most people don't notice, other are mortified. Very rarely do people do it on purpose, it's just there.

22. Turnstiles meant to hit at the waist are basically steel beams aimed at your chest. Try Pelvic bone. Try pushing a turnstile before it notices your token and >slam< into the turnstile. No, I didn't need that bone still in one piece. Also- really awkward bruising right there. Like, seriously.

And finally: 23. Some people think it's okay to talk to you like this: 


Instead of a counterpoint to this stance, I plead the 5th. And by that I mean, don't be so darn short and I won't have to get a hunchback trying to talk to you. Damn shorties.

Also, short people don't have to worry about hitting their head on things like doorways, stairway ceilings, shower curtain rods, etc...

So in conclusion, Dear Renee Jacques, Everybody has problems with their physical attributes. Whether it's being so tall or so short, so thin or big, flat chested or well endowed, a devoted Star Wars fan or a Trekkie, can't we just acknowledge the challenges and gift within each of us and use them to other's advantage? Sure I will make more of an effort to reach that tall thing for you if you will make an effort to keep your kitchen stuff in the back of the lower cabinets.

How I order coffee

My first semester in college I had an 8am class clear on the other side of campus, I mean a 10 minute walk and then 3 flights of stairs. Needless to say I was not once on time. One particularly bad morning I was walking to class, for my 8am midterm, at around 8:35. I stopped in at my usual coffee spot on the way with my usual older coffee lady.

Me: (Apparently speaking in what I assume was poor German for no apparent reason other than tired.) Ich möchte eine tasse kaffe bitte. (German for: I would like a cup of coffee please)

Coffee Lady: Eine große oder kleine? (German for: Large or small?)

Me: (very much confused) Did I ask for coffee in German?

Coffee Lady: Yes.

Me: Oh. Uh, große, bitte. (German: A large cup please) 

Coffee Lady: Coffee's on me. You're going to miss your test.

(I run to class.)

My wonderful Helga with her grandbaby. I don't know who is more adorable.

As it turns out she is from Germany and was just as surprised as I was that I ordered in German!!
After my midterm I came back and chatted with her and we have been friends ever since! And she's bought more than a few cups of Joe for me!

About Time

I'm a total Shipper.

For those of you not in the know- (Amanda) a "Shipper" is a fan description for someone who wants the main characters (or other characters) in a show or movie to get together (relationSHIP) and a noromo is short for NoRomance or people who do not support those relationships. There are also Fencers (you can guess what that is, if not there is Urban Dictionary) but as the first sentence would suggest I am a TOTAL Shipper.

My favourite Shipper moment in the past year or so was this one from Battlestar Galictica:
It's a Father and son conversation, but it's all about Laura Roslin while also being all about the complicated relationship between these powerful men. If you haven't seen it, a Raptor is a type of plane (technically spaceship, but think Cessna with guns).

Adama: I'm just getting in a plane.

Apollo: Waiting alone in a raptor while the rest of the fleet jumps away isn't just "getting in a plane." It sounds a lot like ... well that sounds a lot like suicide Dad.

Apollo: Why are you doing this?

Adama: Because I can't live without her. And Laura is going to get to the rendezvous point. 

I have to believe that.

Because I can't live without her.

I'll spare you, reader, but Laura goes through a huge personal transformation while she is ... not technically but kind of completely kidnapped. If you recall from several moments ago, the Fleet has jumped away with Adama remaining behind Roslin makes it back to the Fleet in the next episode, but Adama gets to her first. 

The incoming hug is about 15 seconds long and 5 minutes too short.

I love you.

About Time.

That smirk! It's About Time. I absolutely love his reaction. Like he didn't already know that she loved him. He was just waiting for her to come to terms with it. Why else would he spend all of his time with her? Why would he sit by her bedside reading his favourite book? One he had never actually finished, but prepared to do so for her. Why would he spend his life dedicated to her, with respect to and for her if not for love? How long would he sit and wait for her to discover the meaning of Love and Life? Forever probably. Until her death. We know that much. We know that she loves him. That he loves her. Which is why we can all completely sympathize with Adama here.
How long has he waited to hear those words? those simple words spoken in Gods' honest truth. 

I love you. 

It really is About Time.

On the Anniversary of Awful

I am thankful everyday that my mom and Joe are alive and in my life. I am blessed to have not 2 but 4 parents that I love and care about me. One year ago today I came very much too close to losing my Dolly and Joe. 

Today least year about 5pm, I signed a lease to live with Jen and Brianna, and at that moment, I got a phone call from my mom letting me know they were alive and (mostly) unscathed.

To this day, it still freaks me out to see pictures and video of the bombing, and it completely rattles my brain to think that someone would do this. I know it wasn't personal, but I can not help but to think that someone woke up that morning and thought to himself, today I will do everything in my power to murder Jane's parents. Every time the news shows that video, all I can see is Joe. Every time they show the faces of the men that did this, all I can think of is how close the people I love were to that violence.

Post Marathon Pride

This picture is my mom and Joe and of course Trixie. I took this picture (at the behest of the local paper) the day after the marathon when they arrived home. There is no better representation I have or can think of to show how glad I was to see them, how glad I was that they were safe, and how proud I am of their accomplishments and determination. 

I love you. 

Dolly Dennery, Marathon Runner

And in the words of my mother: "It makes me want to say, I'm going back, I'm not gonna stop running marathons. I won't let acts of terrorism stop me from doing the things that make me feel alive" 

Hey Boston, I'll see you next week.

A Lamp Unto my Feet

I started working! for a t-shirt company! It's awesome and fun!

Okay, now that I've got that off my chest, I can tell you, faithful reader, about it. First off, allow me to clarify, this is my second part time job which brings me up to about 2/3 of a full time job. I host Quizo in Philly. Two Quizos, actually. One is at the New Deck Tavern in U City and the other is the absolute farthest away from New Deck as possible. The Victoria Freehouse on Front St. Luckily, they are on different days or I would probably just die.

Here's the thing you have to know. I love Quizo. I mean it. I really love Quizo. I love trivia. I love bars and spending time with people. Quizo combines all of those things but with the added benefit of always being right and getting paid for it. I look forward to my quizzing days like a child looks forward to Christmas. or Halloween because let's face it, Halloween is the shit. Hosting Quizo gives me the ability to pay most of my bills and live my daily life without collapsing into a jiggly weeping ball of gelatin at the vaguest mention of bills I owe or money or gas prices. And it's Quizo and my boss is awesome. I love it.

My boss must think I'm awesome too, because he now pays me to go to his warehouse and do worky things for his t-shirt biz too! Double the fun! This will either be the best job working for the coolest guy, or we will spend too much time together, freak out, and never speak again. However I think the later is highly unlikely. Mainly because bills. And I don't know what I would do without Quizo in my life.

I'll be brutally honest with you, everyone on the internet, I have been slipping into a depression the past few months and it sucks. Being unemployed makes me feel like an utterly useless human being. I'm fun! I have skills! I like people! Hire me dammit!

Unemployment is like a dark black oubliette that's cold and lonely and why get out of bed at the crack of mid-afternoon? No one loves me, I have no friends (even the sun left me!), I'm a burden to those around me, everyone in the western hemisphere thinks i'm useless and unskilled and I don't know, maybe they think I kick puppies. (Side note: I don't kick puppies.) 

My Oubliette

I'm sure that everyone hits a funk now and then, but this wasn't a funk. If you sit in that oubliette long enough, with all of the darkness in you written out on the walls in lights, it's all you can see. You start to believe it. Even now I don't believe it when someone tells me that I'm cool, or nice, or a good friend or, last week Ronan (my boss. bosses. new bff. whatever) told me that I am a likable person and that everybody likes me. Everybody likes me? No, Ronan's just messing with me. There's no way that people can think I'm a useful human being. They just don't know me well enough. It's insanity. No one can live like this. Not for an extended period of time. It will break your soul.

Having a job is like having Hoggle (Labyrinth reference) open the door at the bottom of that little room, call the sun over and allow the light to shine on your face. Why yes, I do have to wake up and get dressed today, I have to go to work. No, I can't stay out late tonight guys, I have work in the morning. I have a reason to wake up. I have a reason to leave the house. I feel appreciated and useful and skilled.
Having a job is like that.

So if you know someone who is going through a long-term unemployment, invite them out. Ask them over to watch movies or just hang out. There is nothing worse than felling like your friendship is a burden to someone and that's what not having a job feels like.
Hopefully and prayerfully, I will kick ass at this job and they will think I'm as awesome or awesomer that what they expected in hiring me and Everything else in my life will fall into place. Okay, that may be expecting a bit much from a part-time job, but I feel a change inside of me for the better.

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. I'm no longer in an oubliette, but in a tunnel, and I can see the light now. and the way out.

It's a new year!

Wow. I can't believe January is almost over! 

It's been an eventful month, for me personally, and the City of Philadelphia as well. I started the year by going to the Mummer's Parade, both morning and evening, I started (temporarily) watching my cousin Ashley's boys full time, I have a new Quizo Trivia gig, I started going to (and plan on continuing to attend) a new church, and it's really starting to hit me that I need to start my new home search. 

There is so much that I want to get done before January is over, but it's moving so quickly! I started/continued to read 3 books this month, and if I want to stay on my goal of reading 24 books this year (only 2 books a month!), I'm going to need to finish any of them soon. 

My January/February Booklist

Also I promised myself that I would get more sleep, and have more regular sleep patterns this year. Yeah, that's not going well. Sleep is for the weak.

Ashley's kids are awesome. Jameson is 28 months and Shane is 16 months old. So they are exactly one year apart *not stressful at all*. Really, they are cool, but they drive me nutso. It's been so darn cold out in Philly this whole month that we haven't been able to go out and do anything. It sucks for them and then they drive me nuts. Add not getting any sleep on top of that and my days kind of suck. I will post tales of our adventures, once we have any. Other than indoor fun.

Firefighter Jameson

Doctor Shane

Quizo! I love quizo, I just wish that it didn't interfere with my sleep as much! Monday nights I host at the New Deck Tavern, Tuesday nights I play, Wednesday nights I host at the Victoria Freehouse, some sundays I play too. That means that three-four work nights I am staying out late and getting home later and still have to be up by 7am. I was so thankful for my snow day today. I slept until 2pm. Which, coincidentally, doesn't actually help regulate my sleep pattern. Womp womp womp.

Hmm, what else? Well, there is church. I started going to a new church, and it's not nearly as ethnically diverse as my old church but it's a bit more liberal and open. For instance, they accept openly gay members, which would have been hard at the church of old because practically everyone who attends there is a young married couple. Also, oddly, new church doesn't have a sermon per se on a regular Sunday. They have a reflection time. It takes a bit of getting used to but it's kind of nice to not be preached at. If there is anything I miss from OCMC it's having a sermon. On the other hand, no one is asking me to babysit, so that's a huge plus.

On the book front, and you should expect several more of these updates throughout the year, I started The House of Mirth by Edith Wharton, and I am almost finished The Hobbit by JRR Tolkien, but I'm only 5 pages into Fragile Things by Neil Gaiman. Oh! and I still have about half of The Septembers of Shiraz by Dalia Sofer. 

Currently Reading

Oh My God what is going on with this weather? Seriously, it's crazy. The polar vortex, or as I have taken to calling it, Polar Vortex Part 2: The Climate Strikes Back  has turned my little city into Hothadelphia. (That was a Star Wars reference, Amanda) I just went out and checked, there is 11" of fluffy white snow out there, and it looked like it was deeper out front. We went out to "play" in the snow this afternoon, which involved Brianna jumping around, laying, snow angeling, and trudging in the snow while Jen and I cleaned off our cars and shoveled the walk. News Flash: It's really COLD!!!

Snow Angels!

So I suppose that's it for what I'm up to, next post will be about something that is weighing on my heart, the utter rampage of violence in my city this month. It's really utterly insane. But more upsetting things are for a later date. So long, and have a safe stormy day! 

A Busy Day

Today I ...
* had quail eggs on a bagel for breakfast
* was moved by a church service
* shopped til I DROPPED with mom (My Dolly) Aunt Sharon, Grandmom, and Aunt Reney
* spent some quality time with my bestie Anne after hitching a ride with my little sister Caroline.
* had a wonderful dinner with my mom, Joe, Grandmom, Pop-pop and Aunt Reney
* watched the Broncos kick some major Tom Brady ass with my Pop-pop
* explained Twitter to my 75 year old pop-pop (I think he's totally on board)
* hung out briefly with Joel, who helped inflate my tires (thanks again!!!)
* made plans to buy my Maid of Honor dress tomorrow with Anna Jane Dennery
* am currently in my footie pajamas, moments away from curling up on the couch to watch some Bones and maybe Sherlock.

I'd call today a success.

JFK 50 Miler finishes, finally!

Previous Post- JFK 50 Miler

Coming SOON!!! 

The final follow-up post to the JFK 50 extravaganza! 

Seriously, I'm writing it tomorrow. I'm planning on writing it tomorrow. It's been a rough year. What can I say?